Completely ordinary, flawed people Serving a Completely Perfect EXTRAORDINARY God!! ~Please join us as we embark on God's Next Adventure for our lives.~ First to Hong Kong, then to Brasil, then to Ethiopia, then A BABY?!?! (Mind-Blowing!) Now, back to Brasil! Stay Tuned as we Embark on the Next Chapter the Lord has already written for us! We simply pray that in ALL Things HIS NAME be made Great! God is So Good! He is So Faithful... We are so UNworthy.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Mom is now in Heaven
Mom took a turn for the worse on Monday, Feb 21st. Daddy called us all in. Bonnie and I arrived on February 22nd, Charlie on Feb 24th. (As written in the previous post, February 22nd has always been a special date. "Special" is not the right word, however. It is the anniversary of the day I was diagnosed. To arrive "Home" to see Mom on this day and to reflect on the past 12 years... that's really tough....
Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday were all filled with "the business" of preparations... I've always been able to push emotions aside when in "business" mode... I think that's a Learned Nursing Skill! ...but when things get still... the emotions come back...
Friday was tough. I really didn't think she would make it through the night... I so dreaded waking up the next morning. HOWEVER, I also knew that of all of us... I was likely to be the best prepared of all of us to handle it, so I jumped up quickly, paused... took some really deep breaths. She was still with us. It's such a tough situation... its difficult to figure out exactly WHAT you feel... relief or regret, sadness or joy, anxiety or peace... I've never been so conflicted.
Later that morning her breathing became more rapid and meds weren't really controlling her pain very well. I got very frustrated with not being able to "FIX IT" - another Nursing skill!
My sister began reading for HER Bible. She debated what to read... What do you read?? The Awesome thing about the Bible... it TRULY EVERYTHING is applicable! All of scripture points to JESUS! Bonnie started reading and almost immediately she relaxed....
She entered the Gates of Glory at 3:23 on Saturday, February 26th, 20011 while listening to her favorite Psalms leading her straight into the arms of Jesus!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
12 year Reflections
12 years ago today, just a few small words spoken into the thin expanse of air changed the course of my life, as well as, the lives of those closest to me.
12 years ago today.
The simple words "We think it may be a tumor" were spoken into the cool damp air in Jackson, Mississippi on February 22, 1999. Those words bounced around the stark, blank white walls of the xray department at UMC. Those words spoken by the chief radiologist, as he held back tears of his own. I often wonder about his expression... perhaps he had seen this before, perhaps he knew the seriousness of my case, perhaps he had a daughter my age and thought of the days ahead for her...
12 years ago today, I called my mom and cried with her for 2 hours.
Today, I reflect on that day 12 years ago....... as I hold my mother's frail head and tell her I love her so much. Today, I tell her how I would have never made it through that incredibly tough time in my life without her by my side. Today, I tell her Thank You.
The very disease that brought us SO CLOSE together 12 years ago today is now claiming her life.
The very same disease that the Lord allowed to give me LIFE and the LIVES of my precious sons... will now Take her to be with her Savior. What a contrast. What a Sovereign God we serve.
cancer.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Getting Closer!!!
Now, only his Passport processing and submission to the Embassy for review is left!!!
Thursday, February 17, 2011
My Life in Contrast
My life is a great contrast right now.
My greatest joy of becoming a mother again to our son is shadowed by the impending sadness of the death of my mother. New Life:Earthly Death
My greatest happiness of a gain of a child compared to my loss.
However, I also reflect on my greatest anxiety about parenting two growing boys with the amazing comfort of knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that my precious Mother will be sitting at the Saviour's feet in deep discussion.
I have been preparing for this Contrast for over a year now. I have been fully aware that this Contrast would continue to draw to a peak. As it draws nearer, I find myself in a swirl of emotions. It's much easier to talk about Negash as that situation is happy and joyous and uplifts others. Not as easy to talk about Mom. I've managed to come up with very short, trite responses that really yield nothing as a protective mechanism.
I have fully submitted to the Lord to direct, manage, and orchestrate the climax of both of these events. I have fully surrendered and He has fully accepted! The Lord has so GRACIOUSLY given me such ROCK HARD confirmation that He has ALREADY worked it out! He gave me this Peace back in September. I know, and STAND AFFIRMED that He has a PERFECT plan in place! Not an "ok" plan, not a "good" plan, but a PERFECT, GOD-Sized plan!
Already Praising the Lord for what HE WILL DO!
So thankful that ALL will see HIS HAND and give HIM the GLORY for ALL He will do!
Farewells...
Throughout all of our travels and all of our moves... you'd think that we would have it down by now! Chris and I have been married for 14 years now, and have never been in one place longer than 4 years! We like to joke about not knowing how to clean "4 year old dirt" so we just move! :) So many times we have said Goodbye... knowing that "likely" we would not necessarily see those people again. Saying Goodbye in Brasil was tough... knowing that all would be scattered to the ends of the earth!
Saying Goodbye to Ethiopia wasn't all that tough... holding SECURELY to knowing that we would be back in only a Very Short Time.
Saying Goodbye to Negash was NOT NATURAL. We have loved him for a very long 9 months. It's NOT NATURAL to have to leave him there...... Knowing the process and knowing that it was all set in stone and unalterable helps somewhat. It's just not natural.
On the way home on the plane....... It really hit me HARD... very soon I will have to say a Permanent Goodbye. Well, only Earthly "Permanent" I guess. (to continue in the next post)
So thankful that Heaven is a place of Glorious Reunions.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Processing.... (Saturday Update)
We haven't really had anytime to process this week.
So unbelievable that we are HERE... we are really HERE!
I remember this week in Hong Kong 6 years ago... After seeing Caleb in all those pictures... not really knowing if he was "REAL!" And then being able to touch him and kiss him... so unbelievable!
This time, with Negash, I *KNEW* he was real. But there are so many other precious things about him I didn't know. Even after only spending a collective 6 hours with him, I feel like we have seen his personality and know how incredibly WELL and PERFECTLY that the Lord has chosen this child for us.
The Lord continues to amaze and astound me with His Grace!
Friday, February 11, 2011
Friday Update
WOW! So hard to believe it's already Friday... and yet... it feels like we've been here for SO much longer than just 3 full days.
Today started out visiting the orphanages. We have 3 other families with us now, and 2 of our families from court left last night.
**PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE pray for the other 2 families that had court with us!!! The government officials who did not complete their paperwork were supposed to appear before the Judge this morning at 9am. At 10am, no word yet - the Officials didn't have their papers submitted yet.... At 1am, no word yet... and the Judge was very angry at the Officials for not completing their paperwork... then finally at 4:30 they found out that the Officials had submitted a letter stating they were too busy right now. The Judge was FURIOUS!!!!!! She DEMANDED and wrote a DECREE that the papers must be completed by early week next week. Unfortunately for our friends... they will not find out if they passed court until next week - AFTER they travel home.... heart breaking......... Thankfully everyone is still saying everything is favorable with their case, but the paperwork MESS is really frustrating. Please join me in petitioning the SOVEREIGN one on their behalf. God is BIGGER than paperwork, He is bigger than a Government agency... HE WILL be Glorified in ALL, even this mess.
We got to see Nash again for a couple of hours. We had Frisbees and cars today. We had brought two big blow up balls, and some balloon punch balls... but due to the altitude and not eating breakfast... we didn't think he had the stamina to blow them up AND be able to play afterward! LOL!! Nash was so awesome again today!! They let us play with him by ourselves for a little bit this morning! He greeted us with HUGE smiles and kisses!
We got to see his bed and his friends showed us their beds too. It was an AWESOME Day! The girls came out and LOVED playing with my hair! They would take my hair and put it on top of their heads! Then one had a cardboard cover from a book and was fanning my hair to see it BLOW!! So I would shake my head and make my hair go everywhere! The girls laughed and squealed! The girl with the fan would blow my hair all over my face, then one of the sweet precious boys would come up and gently move all the hair out of my face and put it behind my ear!! I just want to EAT THEM UP.... EVERYONE OF THEM!!!!
We played some more with Nash, then he stopped and got really still.... we couldn't figure out what he saw.... it was the DOCTOR! Apparently the Doctor only comes out every couple of weeks, and they were giving immunizations just inside near a window, and Nash could see them. He got really quiet and nervous. We had Abel ask him if he was scared of the Doctor, and he said no, but his body was saying something altogether different!!
It was time to go and we had Abel tell him that we loved him very much and that we would be back very soon. He put his little head down and said ok. We hugged and kissed and had to go. I got all choked up....... I HATE leaving him.
***
After the orphanages we went at ate at the LUCY Museum. We didn't visit the museum, just ate at their very nice restaurant. *Lucy is the name of the first "complete" (really semi complete) humanoid fossil which was found in Ethiopia. *Supposedly* it is dated for 3.7 million years old. (this is not the place for this discussion...) They are very proud of this!!!
Then we went up the Mountain to another Museum and one of the first Ethiopian Orthodox churches! Abel was able to share with us his PASSION for Ethiopia's rich history! It was incredible! On the way up the mountain, there were ladies carrying MASSIVE bundles of sticks. Abel said they carry these down the mountain EVERYDAY, MULTIPLE times a day to sell for firewood. Each bundle sold for only 20 Birr, which is like $1.25. Very humbling.... We all thought about our dinner that was (for 2) 300 Birr.... we are so privileged. Thank you, Lord for our Provisions, and forgive us when we take that for granted! We also met several groups of boys when we stopped to take pictures... they were so cute... trying to sell these big straw hats. I, stupidly, forgot all my rules and gave them crackers and candy... that was dumb.... The museum and church at the top were really nice!
Then we went to the Lion Zoo. They charge per person AND PER CAMERA! That's so random!!! I took a picture of the sign! :) It was a nice little park with about 6 Lion cages and a few birds and some monkeys. Always nice to get out of the bus from time to time, as the roads here are pretty bad. I never get motion sick in a car... but a few times, I was really CLOSE TO IT!
We are not going in the morning to another orphange/social project. We're tired. We've been running 90 to nothing all week. Last night and tonight we got back around 8:30 and Chris has been passed out by 9! We plan on sleeping in a little bit and trying to take in and process this week! I'm glad that I can write about it to help me break it all down.
We are missing Caleb like Crazy! He and Mimi are doing AWESOME!!! :) He has gotten to play in the snow and have fun with Preston, and Mimi and he were out of school one day! He is making the Southaven Circuit this weekend! :)
I think about how Caleb and Nash will do together. Nash is definitely less impulsive than Caleb is. He's more shy and can only take being the center of attention for a few minutes. He prefers one on one time. We showed Nash Caleb's picture again today and he even showed it to his Nannies! They told him that was his brother in Amharic, and he was smiling and showing all his friends! I know they will play together very well, they will just both need their own "stock" of toys... no required sharing for a little while. Nash is so obedient and wants to please people. We have said no to him about several things, like more cars, more bubbles, etc... AND he did very well with it! He didn't get mad, like the other boys did! I don't think discipline is going to be a Massive issue... you can tell his "FIRST" Mom did an excellent job!! ...pause... So Grateful for her and the BOY she has raised... Lord, please wrap Your amazing arms of love around her... Hold her close!! Let her know her baby is LOVED...
....
The Fryar Family
**Chris, Beverly, Caleb, and Nash**
Wednesday Update (Repost!)
(Tried to send this on Wednesday, but apparently it never posted)
Hey Everyone!!!
I'm not sure how long I'll be able to keep this Yahoo email up...
We arrived in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia on Tuesday night at 10:30pm. Flight was very long... that 3rd leg was killer... but thankfully had great movies and games! (I played Tetris and Reversi for hours!) :) We managed to sleep on the 3rd leg also... plane was only half full, so we got to spread out... a HUGE Blessing for my 6'3" husband!! :)
This morning we met together with 3 other families who are here for Court. We had an orientation meeting this morning and met with the Social Worker... she gave us even more INCREDIBLE information about Nash! She said that whenever she goes to visit him, he is always happy to see her. If her face is not smiling (due to stress or whatever), she says he will always ask her about why she isn't happy. She said he always notices if she has on new glasses or new hairdo. He has asked her recently "have you seen MY Mommy and Daddy? Are they coming soon?" PRECIOUS! We also met with the nurse at the orphanage who went over medical things with me. His low Hemoglobin and Hematocrit are actually NORMAL for Ethiopians, she said. So she said he is not at risk for significant anemia issues. She also said that they were going to immunize him before we come back for our Embassy trip and will do a TB skin test before he leaves. SO THANKFUL for that... I was really nervous about shots so soon after we got home.
Then we ate at a Swedish restaurant for lunch, then off to the orphanage!
THE PICTURES DO NOT DO THIS CHILD JUSTICE!!!! HE IS SO HANDSOME!! At least a FOOT of Eyelashes... his eyes are just CAPTIVATING!! We played with him in a group of 8 boys (and we want to bring them ALL HOME now!!). He is precious!! All the boys called us Mommy and Daddy, which really makes me smile! The AWESOME thing was when the Orphanage worker came in and talked to Nash a second or two, then said "Daddy" and shook Chris's hand, and then "Mommy" and shook my hand. The look in his eyes just said... "YEP, I know!" He's got that coy kind of smile that speaks VOLUMES!!
Nash always wants to make sure, EVEN in an orphanage setting, that everyone is playing and doing ok. He will make sure all the kids have stickers, and all the kids have an equal share. It was REALLY REALLY COOL when one of the boys spilled some bubbles we had taken and the Nanny came in a fussed at them and told them to pick up. NASH was the one who went around and made SURE all the boys put everything back where it went... but he did not do it in a bossy way, but more of the gentle manager way (like his daddy!) It was AWESOME!!
Chris was picking up some kids and throwing them in the air... Nash apparently does NOT like heights... he backed away and silently shook his head no... We smiled at each other! :) I did a super big hug and picked him up off his feet, and I don't think he liked that too much... but he gave us both kisses on our cheeks when we left! We told him we loved him. I am so in love...........
COURT IS TOMORROW!!!!! Please pray!! Birth family will be there also, decision lies with this Judge... but we know WHO hold the GOVERNMENT on HIS SHOULDERS!!! :)
Missing my Angel Baby Caleb... Please pray for him to be strong and courageous (as his name means) this week. We miss him so much and are so excited that he will get to come experience this place with us in a few weeks!
Love you all and miss you dearly!! :)
The Fryar Family
**Chris, Beverly, Caleb, and Nash**
Thursday, February 10, 2011
We Passed Court!!
YEAH!!! We Passed Court!!!
Nash Emmanuel Fryar is now OFFICIALLY our son! God is so Good!!
This morning was SO humbling. Our court appearance was held at the Federal Court downtown. ALL of the birth families also had to come on the same day to stand before the judge and confirm their decision. We walk into that building and were so humbled...... I cried so many times..... we then were taken to a holding room, that was maybe 40ft by 40 ft with chairs along the borders. In this room were all the of the birth families and adoptive families.
Chris and I couldn't speak, could hardly breathe..... looking straight into all of their faces... knowing what a sacrifice they have done FOR THE ULTIMATE LOVE OF THEIR CHILD....
I was NOT ready for this..... It was so hard.
The Bethany director called 4 birth families into the room with the judge. We were not sure if they were all of our children's families or not... we actually thought we would wait for hours there. Those 4 families then exited the room, and the 4 pairs of our group were called in. The judge was very orderly, concise, direct. Asked us all very few questions that we all answered together. We all confirmed that we were aware of the need to protect their cultural identity and that we were indeed all confirming our desire to be our kids parents.
Then we exited..... On the way out, we passed through the group that had been called in first... OUR BIRTHFAMILIES, but it all happened so fast it didn't really sink in until about 10 minutes later that they were our birth families. It was so hard.......
The government officials over international adoptions had failed to send in our paperwork that morning that was necessary for the Judge to make her decision.... so we waited.
We visited NASH again!! Thankfully due to a change in schedule!! We weren't supposed to see him today, only Friday.
What a GREAT visit we had with him!! We played with stickers and he read his ABC's to Chris and counted to 10 and picked out names for pictures. When he picked out an Airplane... I asked him "Negash want to go on an Airplane?" He motioned that the airplane went in the sky. I asked him again and pointed to his little chest "Negash want to go on an Airplane in the sky?" He confirmed YES with a HUGE SMILE!
We showed him a picture that Chris had in his wallet of him, and the thought that was so cool! He had to show all of his friends!! Then we showed him a picture of Caleb with us. He showed that to his friends too! I know that he understands all of this!! So excited about him!! He is precious!!
After visiting, Abel picked us up again and we asked if he had heard from court… he called the Bethany director and he confirmed that we passed!! He said he would call about the other families when they were with us also (their kids are in another orphanage, so we traveled back to pick them up!).
One of the other families was approved today also!! But 2 of them had a paperwork glitch… their documents were never turned in today. So they must wait until tomorrow… PLEASE PRAY FOR OUR FRIENDS! We hurt for them today, as they felt this set back. Please pray that it will only be a delay of 1 day! GOD IS SO BIGGER!!
Hopefully this will post before the internet shuts off again!
Love you guys so much! Thank you for following our process and for all of your support and love! J
The Fryar Family
**Chris, Beverly, Caleb, and Nash**
Wednesday, February 09, 2011
Limited Email!
Hey Everyone!!!
I'm not sure how long I'll be able to keep this Yahoo email up...
We arrived in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia on Tuesday night at 10:30pm. Flight was very long... that 3rd leg was killer... but thankfully had great movies and games! (I played Tetris and Reversi for hours!) :) We managed to sleep on the 3rd leg also... plane was only half full, so we got to spread out... a HUGE Blessing for my 6'3" husband!! :)
This morning we met together with 3 other families who are here for Court. We had an orientation meeting this morning and met with the Social Worker... she gave us even more INCREDIBLE information about Nash! *Will post later!
Then we ate at a Swedish restaurant for lunch, then off to the orphanage!
THE PICTURES DO NOT DO THIS CHILD JUSTICE!!!! HE IS SO HANDSOME!! At least a FOOT of Eyelashes... this eyes are just CAPTIVATING!! We played with him in a group of 8 boys (and we want to bring them ALL HOME now!!). He is precious!! More later... if the internet holds up! *I plan to write on a Word Document and then cut and paste here... so I don't have to worry about losing it if the Internet hiccups!! ...AND if I have time.. they have been filling our days full and we are very tired!
COURT IS TOMORROW!!!!! Please pray!! Birth family will be there also, decision lies with this Judge... but we know WHO hold the GOVERNMENT on HIS SHOULDERS!!! :)
Missing my Angel Baby Caleb... Please pray for him to be strong and courageous (as his name means) this week. We miss him so much and are so excited that he will get to come experience this place with us in a few weeks!
Love you all and miss you dearly!! :)
The Fryar Family
**Chris, Beverly, Caleb, and Nash**
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Greetings from Holland!!
Amsterdam is really cool! I've been giggling at everything! The gift shops have the cutest Cow stuff! And they have Soft Clog Houseshoes for kids that looks just like the Wooden Shoes!! Amazing! And of course all the neat windmills and dairy maid things!
I am MUCH Enjoying the People watching here!! AND... they have COKE LIGHT, tastes just like it did in Brazil! :)
We're now relaxing over a nice Egg McMuffin after a long night. We managed to only get a couple of divided hours of sleep over the night, just hard to get comfy. PRECIOUS little Indian girl, probably about 2, kept SQUEALING crying all night. I felt so bad for her mom and grandmom.
We're here for another 2 hours then on to our flight to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia! Just found out that we have a short layover/refuel in Khartoum, Sudan!
The Lord is so good to us in allowing us to see new parts of the world He created... Love His Creativity!
Monday, February 07, 2011
Sunday, February 06, 2011
It was a little sad to say bye to Caleb for the week, but he and Mimi are going to have an amazing week!!
Love you guys!! :)
Friday, February 04, 2011
Just wanted to send a brief update on us!!
We leave Sunday for Ethiopia! This will be the first of two trips for us! We are thrilled to be able to finally touch our son, NASH, who has been our son since July. It's just amazing how the Lord can prepare our hearts to be so in Love with this child, whom we have never met!! We arrive in Ethiopia on Tuesday and will get to meet Nash on Wednesday. Nash is 6 years old and is just precious!! We are not allowed to send any pics or post them on the blog... but I GUARANTEE you... that when I'm legally able... Pics will be EVERYWHERE!! :) I will be blogging while we are in Ethiopia, and possibly emailing also. Please check in on the blog that I am trying diligently to keep updated. www.FryarsInTheField.blogspot.com
Here is a brief update on us and what the Lord has been doing in our lives over the past year! This is VERY BRIEF... we are amazed at how faithful the Lord has been to us!!! Truly HUMBLED and in AWE! Every few months He has shown us a little more of HIMSELF and a *SMALL* glimpse of some of the Amazing Things HE has in store for us!! He is LEADING US... bit by bit, piece by piece. *I am truly thankful that He does not show us he WHOLE Picture when we aren't ready for that!
If you had told me back in 1997 when Chris and I got married that I would have survived Cancer, changed nursing fields to Oncology, Adopted a son, traveled to Hong Kong, Chris & I would both leave EXCELLENT Financially secure jobs and a great house & life to go to Brazil to work as volunteers - fully supported financially by others, live in Brazil for 3 years, and NOW adopt another son and travel to Africa... I would have told you that you were CRAZY!! Absolutely Certifiably CRAZY! ...but you know... that is EXACTLY how the LORD works!!! He doesn't follow the rules of the "American Dream" He pushes us beyond our borders, beyond what "WE" are capable of... because that is where He wants us... He wants us DEPENDENT on Him alone! So that all we do and all that we are... REFLECTS HIM! This is how He is GLORIFIED!!!
The Lord has been so Good, He has been so Faithful!
We look at the next 6 months and see a time of massive change, great sadness, great joy, amazing new discoveries, and more ways for us to CLING to the CROSS!
Chris enrolled into the Master’s program at Mid-America in August and has been taking full time hours. He is loving his classes, instructors, and classmates. He is also involved in two very different ministries. Care Stone is a retirement center, in which Chris preaches every other Sunday. Caleb is a HUGE HIT with the residents!! :) Youth Villages is a residential center for very high risk youth. Chris has a group of 12-15 teenage boys who he is building relationships with and is allowed to preach every Saturday. The Lord is doing a MIGHTY work in the hearts of those boys—including 2 boys committing their lives to the Lord! Please pray for your new brothers in Christ! Chris also works full time at the NICS office! What a blessing he has to work with amazing Christian men and women! HE ALSO.... still does all the books for our school in Brazil! He is still working as the business manager in nearly the same capacity he did when we lived there! ...only no lunch duty!! - but he misses that the most! :)
Beverly is loving being back at the West Clinic. She really loves her job as a Research Nurse and her relationships with her patients. Taking 2 Cor 1:3-7 as her guide, she works diligently to share Christ’s comfort to those living & fighting cancer. We still try to keep in contact with our babies from Brazil who are now spread all over the world! Our hearts still have their fingerprints!!
Caleb continues to grow and mature into a precious child with a Love for Jesus. He is really thriving in Karate and is a Yellow belt now! He has an incredible teacher at school and he is doing very well. He loves math & science and everything “Boy”! His newest joy is telling jokes that he makes up. So Funny! He is excited about being a Big Brother, although he is anxious to get Nash here!! It's hard on a little guy to talk about something for 9 months!!
Mom has been slowly declining since last September. She was admitted to Hospice Care 3 weeks ago. My Dad is doing very well! He has an amazing outlook on things as he calls Mom "his mission field"! Dad says their Aide is amazing! She is very gentle and loving with Mom! Praise the Lord for amazing people that have been there to support Mom and Dad. Please continue to pray for her. She has comfort in knowing her Salvation is secure. I'm so thrilled that she will be able to discuss Prophecy with Isaiah and John THEMSELVES!! :) She has always LOVED Prophecy and the End Times. She loves the way the entire Bible points to Jesus and His Second Coming to take the Church as His Bride into Eternity!
We are cherishing our time together as a family & have been able to guard our family time effectively. We are thrilled about our church, Fellowship Memphis, & some exciting ministry opportunities ahead. We continue to pray that the Lord continue to use us in the fullest capacity.
All to His Glory alone.
We love you all dearly and THANK YOU so much for all your support, encouragement, and love that you have shown us over the years!! Many people have asked what they can do or how they can help. Once we get back from Ethiopia, we'll have a better idea of what is needed!! I will keep you posted! :)
Many Blessings!
~Beverly for the Fryar Family - Chris, Beverly, Caleb and Nash!